


All Around Weird Day

by groffiction



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Body Swap AU, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Happy Ending, Lil fun oneshot, M/M, Soulmates, crack humor, lil bit of angst, lil bit of fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-23
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:06:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26607955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/groffiction/pseuds/groffiction
Summary: Tony and his boyfriends have a really weird but satisfying day and evening after an alien attack. Soulmate bodyswap oneshot with crack humor and of course explicit naughtiness. ;)Told from Tony's POV for the most part.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, stuckony
Comments: 7
Kudos: 100
Collections: Stuckony Summer Stocking 2020





	All Around Weird Day

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by [ladysunflower](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladysunflower/pseuds/ladysunflower) in the [stuckony_summer_stocking_2020](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/stuckony_summer_stocking_2020) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> **SHORT PROMPTS:**  
>  1) Soulmate bodyswap  
> 2) Kink gone wrong  
> 3) Getting Steve to curse  
>   
>  **LONG PROMPTS:**  
>  1) Steve comes back from the dead to find that Bucky and Tony are now dating, having been in relationships with both of them, but at different times, prior. Steve doesn't want to break them up, but it really seems like they are both trying to get with him now, and he doesn't know what to do about it!  
> 2) Bucky and the Winter Soldier are separate personalities timesharing one body, which means that Tony technically has _three_ boyfriends.  
> 3) Tony and Modern!Bucky have a contentious soulmate relationship. They're on a break when Cap is unfrozen and they finally meet their third. Can they come together to make it work?  
>   
>  **DO NOT WANTS:** Daddy Kink, Humiliation, Mafia/Mob AU, Kidfic, Character Bashing, Treats
> 
>  **LIKES:** I like non-MCU properties (616, Ults if you fix the Bucky issue, cartoons, AA game, etc), but I am not opposed to an MCU spin-off AU or ambiguous continuities. I just would prefer fics that do not strictly follow canon MCU.
> 
>  **SOCIALS:** Discord Siddalee#3418

All Around Weird Day

It all started one gorgeous day in mid September when the leaves were just beginning to turn, and the air was crisp but not too cold to be uncomfortable. Tony usually liked these sorts of days, being able to have an excuse to wrap himself up in one of Bucky or Steve’s sweaters (not that he needed one, to be honest), and sip some pumpkin spiced concoction from the local cafe. Then maybe curl up in one of his couches with the two and watch old horror movies because his boyfriends were all about old shit, and he didn’t mind humoring them. Considering both were older than dirt, though looked like they were only in their mid thirties - thank god for the serum and all that jazz, he figured he could cut them some slack.

And it’s not like he didn’t secretly enjoy the nostalgic feel of watching _Arsenic and Old Lace_ or _Wolfman_ , yadda, yadda.

But, sadly, today didn’t turn out to be one of those casual ones where they weren’t on a mission.

In fact, even that was going on just peachy, until the three of them managed to get hit by some sort of alien blast from nasty squid like things and suddenly things were definitely _NOT_ ok.

All three of them were relatively alive and unscathed besides a few bumps and bruises, but to Tony’s shocked mind, he couldn’t help but realize that something was incredibly wrong. For one, he was taller than he normally was - which, ok, that was a nice plus, but then there was the fact that his left shoulder suddenly had an attached metal arm on it. 

That was definitely _not_ right.

Licking his lips, he squeezed his metal fist in shock before he had to swing around and blow something up to keep from being shot at again by some dumb stinky alien. 

His body reacted on instinct and muscle memory, as if taking over for his brain while it tried to come into the staggering realization that he was now not in his _OWN_ body, but in fact in **Bucky’s**. Scowling once the creature was blasted to kingdom come, Tony turned and spotted his _OWN_ body try to stand in all that armor, and suddenly went kathunk face first onto the ground.

Absently he muttered, his voice coming out gruff, “Hey, now, don’t damage the goods!”

Iron Man-who-was-no-longer-Tony absently grumbled under his breath and then finally was able to stand with the help of Steve. Narrowing his eyes thoughtfully at Steve, he guessed, “Bucky?”

“Yep. How’d you guess?” Steve-that-was-actually-Bucky asked, checking to make sure their other boyfriend was ok before stepping back to assess the situation at hand.

“Somehow I doubt you’d have an issue being in one of my suits - considering you are always in my lab nowadays.” When Steve-that-was-Bucky turned a glower on him, he raised both his hands in mock surrender. “ _Robocop_ who is now _Captain Stripes on His Ass Dimples_ , don’t give me that look. It looks weird coming off of Steve. And speaking of Steve, you ok in there?”

Jarvis helpfully pitched in and allowed Tony-that-was-now-Steve’s face plate to slide open. “Tony, how in the world do you move around in this thing? I can literally feel your stomach shrinking in from the lack of food, and your muscles -”

“ _Watch_ it buddy. I wasn’t hearing you complaining last night when I -” Tony broke in when suddenly Nat chimed in over their earpieces,

“Hey you three, is everything alright down there?” 

Bucky-that-was-now-Steve glowered up at the sky, where another slew of alien monsters was swarming. Then he barked out, “Tony is now in _MY_ body, _I_ am in **Steve's** and fucking _Steve_ is in **Tony’s**! And _THAT_ is coming our way! Does it fucking look **OK** to you?!”

“Excuse me?” Clint asked. “Did they do a body swap or was that just a kinky outburst none of us wants to know about?”

“Focus, Barton,” Fury all but growled. 

Nat ignored them and stated, “Ok, we are on our way.”

### 

Despite the alarming situation, all three were able to kill off the rest of the aliens with the help of the other Avengers without getting too badly wounded or worse. Still, all three were now covered in slime, and if there were a few things that they all had on their brains right then was that they wanted 1) to get a much needed shower, and 2) try and figure out what the hell happened to cause this mess and 3) how to get themselves to change back. The Avengers had a message in to Thor, hoping against hope that the god would be able to have some ideas and solutions. 

Until then, the three of them were stuck - or at least they might be.

At least they were alive, so that was something. Tony figured that the day couldn’t get any worse, considering.

He even managed to take a hot shower, before his shoulder started aching something fierce. Damn, how in the hell did Bucky put up with this annoying pain? Then again, his own body had it’s scars and he even wasn’t going to think about the arthritis in his joints. Perks of living the hard life and getting older. At least Bucky’s body seemed well fit and spry, for a 100 year old. Blessings and curses of the serum. 

Despite being very curious about his “new” body, Tony figured he was 1) way too damned tired to do anything about it and 2) about ready to eat a whole truck he was so hungry. He suddenly understood quite well why his super soldier boyfriends acted like bottomless pits after a mission. In fact, by the time he was dressed (miraculously not snagging the metal hand or components on anything in the process) and headed down in the common room, he was incapable of speaking, he was salivating so much.

Before he could enter the kitchen, Steve appeared (in Tony’s body) with a heaping plate of food for him. With a grunt, not even saying a thank you, Tony took the plate and went to go sit down, already shoveling food in his mouth. Steve scratched his head sheepishly and shrugged, before heading back into the kitchen to feed Tony’s actual body. 

Not even really tasting what he was putting in his mouth, Tony kept eating, pausing only to drink some water Bucky handed him in passing. Once his stomach was finally sated, he looked up from his empty plate and spotted Steve eating SPAM of all things. When he grimaced and put the tin down, Tony snorted. “That’s right babe, you are now enjoying _my_ tastebuds.”

“That is disturbing on a whole bunch of levels, but ok,” Steve said with a sigh. 

“So, how long do you think this is going to last?” Bucky asked, coming over to sit between the two, absently rubbing his left arm, which was Steve’s flesh one. 

“I don’t know,” Steve said, again sighing.

Tony, feeling as if he’d just gotten a second wind, waggled his eyebrows and suggested, “We can always play around until they figure something out.” It was a bit weird, to be sure, considering he was talking about possibly fucking himself or Bucky (in Steve’s body), but honestly, it’s not like this was going to stay this way, right?

“You know, that ain’t a bad idea, babe,” Bucky mused with a sly smirk, which was way too hot on Steve’s face. “Good opportunity, right? Be a shame to let it pass.”

Steve rolled his eyes, but huffed out an amused laugh. It’s not like he could protest in this sort of situation. And, he had to admit, it was definitely hot sounding.

### 

The resulting blow job was the best Tony had ever had - in his life. Having no refractory periods was definitely a blessing. Just feeling Bucky go down on him over and over, in Steve’s body, and even seeing his own body naked with Steve’s mind stuck in it, shaking from pleasure was definitely nice. But then when he came again for the fifth time down Bucky’s throat, something happened.

It was like a flash started surrounding all three of them, blinding all three. When it was over, Tony was now in Steve’s body, Bucky was now in Tony’s body, and Steve was in Bucky’s body. Hell, could this day get any weirder?

“Maybe it’s trying to resolve itself? Whatever it is that happened to us?” Tony assumed, feeling way too tempted to smoosh Steve’s pecs just to see what it felt like.

When Steve caught him doing just that, he rolled his eyes fondly. “Ok, either that, or perhaps sex makes it try to settle faster?” Bucky guessed, absently pulling Tony in for a deep and hungry kiss.

### 

Finding himself up against a wall this time, being fucked by one horny Steve in Bucky’s body, this was definitely nice. Steve let out a deep moaning grunt as he pounded Tony hard and fast while Bucky was sucking him off below in Tony’s body. It was so weird but so hot, and Tony found out he had another couple of kinks to add to his naughty list. 

This was hot and wild and if Steve didn’t hit his prostate again he was going to scream. Steve hit it right on the money, and Tony found himself shouting loud and hoarse, cursing a blue streak. Bucky sucked him dry, taking down his essence like it was the tastiest ice cream cone on the planet. 

Oh yeah, this was weird, but so, so good.

### 

Almost the entire night had the three boys Christening every surface they could fuck on. And by the time they fell in bed, they still had not switched over, and they figured it was ok. Cuddling up with no blankets whatsoever because Jesus, Steve’s body felt like a total furnace, they dosed.

Surprisingly there were no dreams or nightmares to hassle them. 

And when the next dawn came, Tony was almost dismayed to find himself back in his own body, normal again. However, there was an interesting tattoo on the inside of his thigh that he’d definitely never seen before. Rubbing his finger over it, he hissed at how sensitive it was. He then noted Steve and Bucky had similar markings. He suddenly remembered where he’d seen something like these before. They were soulmarks. The three of them were soulmates afterall.

Took a weird ass alien to reveal it, but hey, Tony was more open to weird than most humans.

Steve snuffled a bit and cursed in his sleep, causing Bucky to start chuckling softly in amusement. 

“You know, I don’t think I’ve heard such a vocabulary potty mouth on him like what he did last night. He’s been holding out on me,” Tony whispered dryly to Bucky, who grunted in agreement.

The former Winter Soldier looked fucked up ways to Saturday, and looked adorably sleepy. 

Leaning in to capture Bucky’s lips, he reveled in the fact that things were starting to feel normal again. Yeah, it had been fun the night before with all of their extra kinks they got to explore. But, this was nice. Bucky pulled away and stroked his face tenderly, murmuring softly, “You’d be surprised to know that it’s Stevie who taught me my first cuss words.”

“What? No way!” Tony gasped in delight. 

“Quite the sassy little shit back in the day,” Bucky admitted. 

Steve rumbled out a despairing sigh as Tony started poking his shoulder. “Oh my god, now I want to hear you curse like a sailor. Come on now, let it out! I wanna hear it, Steve!”

The blonde Super Soldier rolled his eyes and turned over in bed so he could face his two boyfriends, one looking amused beyond belief, and one looking honestly delighted and curious.

“Fucking hell, Tony, you want me to cuss? Or….” He then dropped his voice low and seductively, “ _Do you want me to talk dirty to you....?_ ”

“Can’t I have both?” Tony asked innocently.

Bucky turned over and busted a gut, and after a minute of hearing his loud infectious laughter, Tony started in and finally Steve.

The End.


End file.
